I decided for this post, I would ask my group this question: What have you always wanted to ask a deaf person? I’m very open with answering things about my disability, for I feel you won’t learn until you ask.
Q: Do you ever miss music?
A: I actually do love music, I don’t listen as much as a hearing person. I wore hearing aids before I got my implant and I enjoyed it then. I do enjoy it more now. I do require a song to be very clear and to have a good beat usually. Lyric videos are my life saver! And actually, I started exploring more music because my ex-boyfriend was really into it and he introduced me to a lot of things I wouldn’t have heard otherwise.
Q: Does it feel good to be able to just turn off your hearing when you feel tired?
A: Hell yes. Constant listening is HARD. And sometimes sounds get loud and overwhelming. It is absolutely a blessing to just “turn off” for a few hours. I actually rarely listen to TV with sound, it’s one less thing I need to focus on.
Q: Are you afraid that water will ruin your hearing?
A: Yes, actually. My implant is an Advanced Bionics Harmony, and that is expensive! Thank you Canada, my implant was covered, but replacement parts are not cheap. And it is not waterproof. There’s only one waterproof implant out on the market at this point and that is Advanced Bionics Neptune, which I do not have. Below is an example image of my current implant.
Q: How did you learn to talk if you couldn’t hear the words?
A: It wasn’t easy that is for sure! I did get hearing aids when I was 18mths old, but still had to be taught how to speak. I had a speech therapist at my children’s hospital and we went multiple times a week. She would work on individual sounds, such as “b-b-b-b-” or “rrrrrr” then we’d practice words and sentences. I also had to work on my listening skills and how to cope in a hearing world. And billions of repetitions! Think about it: it takes a hearing child a few dozen repetitions of a word for them to understand and use it in their language (less probably if it’s a bad word!). For a deaf child, you need to repeat that word hundreds of times. So here’s kudos to my mom for being SO dedicated and instrumental to where I am today.
Q: Do you have a Canadian accent?
A: Yes! I do have a Canadian accent (I’m from Ontario, so sometimes some Quebec slips in there too). I can imitate other accents. I can understand others with accents, though some I have more trouble with than others. My favourite accents are British and German, though I do like a nice southern drawl. I also do say eh and sorry a lot. A LOT. Sorry.
Q: Would learning a new language be harder or easier?
A: Anyone can learn ASL, American Sign Language, as long as you have hands! But other languages, it really depends! I have some French because I live in a bilingual country. I actually have a pretty solid Quebec accent. For myself, I struggle with languages because it’s not something that comes easily to me. That is not to say other deaf people can’t learn them and find them difficult. I read French much easier than I speak it or hear it. I feel I could be good at Spanish if I took the time to learn.
Q: Have you tended towards replacing sense of sound with haptics?
A: I had to look up this one. Haptics is communication via touching. And actually YES. I use vibrations to tell me a lot. Is someone walking across the floor? If I’m familiar with you, I can probably tell who it is. I use wind vibrations to also tell me someone passed me. Music that has that bass is awesome Often I will get someone’s attention by touching them rather than calling their name. Touch is incredibly important to me.
Q: Do a lot of people talk slower to you when they first learn you’re deaf, and do you think it’s rude?
A: Some do! And it depends on the situation. Some people have a really fast rate of talking (looking at you California) so slowing down is absolutely helpful. But if you’re taaaaalking reeealllly sloooooow liiiiike diiiiis, that’s seriously annoying. It makes it harder to lipread than anything else. I’ve had a few people do it on purpose and those people are just jerks. But for the most part, just speak normally.
Q: Do you feel helpless when your hearing doesn’t work?
A: No. I mean, I do feel frustrated when my implant isn’t functioning properly, I get panicky when I can’t find it, but in the long run, I can get by. It’s more annoying to me than anything else. One thing that happens a lot is when I’m riding horses and wearing my helmet is that it often bumps my implant and cuts off my hearing, let it come back the next second, cut it off again, then back. Then I have to stop and fix it to a better spot so it’s not distracting.
Q: What are some normal everyday things that we wouldn’t know is better or worse for you?
A: Well that’s broad, but I’d say taking sounds for granted. I wake up in the morning to my vibrating alarm clock and I may not put on my implant right away. So I don’t hear birdsong, the fridge going, the stairs creaking, things like that, unless I do wear my implant. I also try not to put it on when I know there’s something noisy going, because a wall of sound after silence is overwhelming. Also constant straining to listen all day, trying to identify sounds/voices is very tiring on me. But a bonus is I can turn off my ears at will!
Q: Is there anything that you feel you’ve missed out on or will never experience?
A: Sound itself, really. Even with an implant it’s close to normal hearing but it’s not normal hearing. I also always have difficulty with group conversations; that’s so difficult to pick out who’s speaking and what they’re saying. I also once wanted to have a career as a pilot, but quickly realized they kind of use a radio for communication so that was out. I won’t ever experience being able to hear normally or have an idea what that really is LIKE. Sometimes I feel like I might have more friends to talk to if I could hear normally but I have such a great online group as well so this helps me tremendously.
Q: What’s the most mundane thing that is more difficult that a hearing person might not even consider or take for granted?
A: Telephone conversations are really hard. It stresses me out if I know I have to talk to someone important on the phone. Television, I need to have subtitles or closed caption, or it’s like watching a moving picture show with no sound or context. When someone says, “What was that noise?” When sirens go – often I have no idea where they are.
Q: Does it influence your writing in any way? Are you more or less likely to include sound descriptions?
A: What an awesome question! I honestly never thought about this before. I do have sound descriptions in my writing but come to think of it, they tend to be more generalized. I write more sight or scent descriptions than sound. My editor has actually pointed out that my dialogue isn’t as good as it could be, and we’ve since figured out that I have trouble with cadence in writing speech. Which makes perfect sense since I have trouble hearing it in real life. It’s something I need to practice and get better at.
Q: Is your inner monologue different to you than your normal voice?
A: Actually yes. I sound different in my head than I speak. It’s hard to describe though. I think I have a broader range in my head lol.
Q: How come speaking is rare in Deaf culture?
A: Deaf culture people don’t see deafness as a disability. They also generally do not want to be “fixed”. So many are against hearing aids or implants. There’s no right or wrong in this situation, just personal choices.
Q: Does it ever affect a deaf person’s sanity if they can’t ever hear?
A: Wait, are you calling me crazy? Because I am. In all honesty, no. You can’t miss what you never know. Just like blind people. And don’t forget it’s not typically total silence either, there are many ranges of deafness.
Q: Are deaf people good at lipreading?
A: You kinda have to be to survive. That isn’t to say it’s easy. It’s not. Only 30% of English sounds are visible on the lips, which means the other 70% is guesswork and logic. See why it’s tiring?
Q: Do deaf people have sharpened senses? Are they more observant?
A: Yes, absolutely. I am more sensitive to sight and touch. I will catch things moving that other people do not. I get distracted easily by bright colours or moving objects. When one sense is gone or dulled, the others must cover for that missing sense.
Q: Are you a dog person or a cat person?
A: Doggo of course.
Well, I hope that was interesting for you guys! Feel free to hit me up with any more questions you might have! I had a lot of fun answering these for you all. Thanks to my amazing group!
Quiet Words 